# we reset things over here!! 2025-07-11T17:51:11.147Z I really didn't like how my diary blog looked so I found this AWESOME code and now!!! wow!! amazing1 But a more IMPORTANT update here- I'm changing my name (again).
It's pretty weird and disrespectful to be using an asian name when you've got no asian blood in you, no matter how long you spend trying to convince yourself otherwise. so for a while I'm gonna be searching for a name I can ACTUALLY use without being an absolute weeb.
(I'll still answer to any name you call me. within reason. and if you make it clear that ur speaking to me)
AAND in other news- NOLI TODAY!!! Yeah I play forsaken and I SUCK AT IT. Quaking in my boots for this update because I've seen Noli gameplay and. dear god is he fast. is noli nonbinary?? [tag] site [tag] life [tag] not midnight # SORT YOURSELF OUT DEDMOS 2025-07-12T22:15:11.147Z right. so. i foudn some names. Here's my list of possible names-

-nos -sol -deimos (wow. who wouldve guessed dedmos also wants to go by deimos) -null (???)

yeah. you can tell I like short names. uhhh idk put up in the chatbox what name sounds better and I'll probably (aka most definitely) go by the one with the most thingies. votes??? votes.
ANYWAYS
I actually went outside today (to go to the shop to pick up a parcel). While I was there weighing out my options there was the ROUDIEST family ever. "Why?" you may ask- there were two kids in shorts running about the store screaming and swearing (and plus the whole faily was shirtless and barefoot for some reason??)
normally I wouldn't complain since I'm not the most polished thing out there but come on... don't run around the store pls thanks.
Would you be surpised if that WASNT the biggest issue today? because I was. Before going to the store I DID use my camera app to check my hair, and for some reason my camera app loves to take random photos of me without knowing. So, I ended up with a photo of my back turned and I thought "wow. I am a FATASS." and now I cant stop thinking about it!!!
oh yeah. I also forgot to say I updated my kinlist to add a few guys. its really sad how the mandela catalogue turned out to be fetish content because it was such a good concept. I also kin like 2 people from every media I touch is that normal.
I had to hold myself back from adding jonah because I thought "yeah this is a bit much how do you kin 2 regretevator 2 forsaken???? who are you" [tag] midnight [tag] life [tag] vent? [tag] names # my bones are popping 2025-07-14T22:15:11.147Z hmm hmmm... yes. I didn't update last night because I honestly left it too late. I spent my whole day waiting for 8pm so that I could make my trek to the kebab shop and over indulge in greasy food. the result? a weeping bank account.
but once again I CARE NOT. I HAVE BIGGER ISSUES RIGHT NOW.
my hands have started to become all cracked and dry again but I think I saw some moisturiser in the bathroom??? I guess I'll just wear my gloves around the house i dont know
in other news- harvard apparently has online learning courses. ONES FOR HTML!! AND PYTHON!! AND CSS!!>!?? apparently you can put that onto your CV and uni applications too so I'll be looking into that.
especially because I feel like this site could look SO MUCH BETTER if it was hand coded (and therefore I knew what made everything tick). Like. in the past this site has looked so cool but it could be EVEN COOLER if I knew how to code properly.
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm yes [tag] not midnight [tag] life [tag] site # for you who's stuck in place 2025-07-15T22:33:11.147Z I enrolled into an online harvard class today which was cool. Thought I could out it into my CV but BOY did I think wrong! you gotta pay £200 FOR A CERTIFICATE! I'm not doing that.
but concerning the site I updated it to add an ACTUAL photo of me IRL. It's pretty old but yknow it's all I got. enjoy that stuff. oh yeah also updated kinlist
How can people go out every single day talking to people wihtout stopping? this is hwy I'm not suitable for a job and people should stop bugging me about it. I'll stick to comissions thanks ty
lalalalalalalalala I played a new game and my hands are crackly again. At this point just attach rok=cks to my hands iykyk [tag] midnight [tag] life [tag] site [tag] vent? # get me out or let me do something productive 2025-07-16T17:44:11.147Z I probably need to apologize for how angsty that precious entry for today was. Yknow when you have so many options for what you could be doing? all with similar outcomes but you also have so little time? thats literally what that was a result of.
But I'm better now. I took a deep breath and told myself that with the time I'm currently spending freaking out I could be doing actually productive stuff.
anyways. Tomorrow I'm gonna meet up with some IRLs to get our art stuff and hang out. i'm pretty excited because they're my friends, why wouldn't I be excited??
they also said they'll give me free mcdonalds, but I don't really care about that. also seeing Jimmy from moutwashing IRL (aka.. yknow... )
oh. and finally, the site will be handcoded over time, I'm just putting it on the backburner for a bit so I can focus on art n stuff. Hope thats ok will all of you. [tag] midnight [tag] life # WITH THE GANGALANG! 2025-07-17T21:14:11.147Z As I mentioned yesteday, I went out with some of my favourite IRLs to get out art stuff. Even tho I could have stayed home doing god knows what, I'm glad I actually went out
I was actually way earlier than needed. Like. an hour early. But that's fine since I got to chill out for a bit before we all actually went to our old school
And speaking of our old school- what is their issue?!? A bit of background here: We actually left that school a year ago, and during our abscence we've been BOMBING that place with emails asking "hey! when can we collect out stuff?"
yap yap yap montsh of being ignored and miscommunication later and we're there, and what do they say to us? "we didn't really plan this well" YEAH. YOURE TELLING US. FOR ONE THEY DIDN'T EVEN HAVE THE MAIN THING I NEEDED (my sketchbook, which I was going to use for my portfolio)???? HOW DO U LOSE A SKETCHBOOK???
uhh after that we went to mcdonalds and I demolished like 5 million calories worth, and then we went to a store and got matching plushies before chilling
hmmm yep. I got home at like 6 and ate soup for dinner [tag] midnight [tag] life [tag] outings # demo dedmos 2025-07-19T21:14:11.147Z i've had a pretty big lack of diary entries for the past couple of days (aka more inconsistencies) cuz the days are honestly blending into one.
The only way I actually know it's a different day is when I have somethign going on. Otherwise I don't really know what day it is
Anyways. I made a new index page thingy, its not done yet but I'm pretty proud of how I basically hand coded that shit (apart from the scrolling marquee...). For someone who mainly relies on pre-made code it's not that bad
I also finally picked out a new name. I chose 'demo' not only because it was easy (just shortened version of dedmos) but also because like this site I will never be the 'finished' version of myself- therefore I am a demo.
haha get it. hmmmmmmmmm.
yeah I need to get on with college work more. I checked the planner thign and turns out we actually don;t need to do much work for the summer
I've just overcomplicated it by wanting to get a good chunk of my portfolio n stuff done took [tag] midnight [tag] life [tag] names [tag] site # ten ten ten ten 2025-07-20T21:14:11.147Z I woke up to a crushed moth at my side. Like. I rolled over and saw a little moth crushed where my arm was. What does that mean?
either way, I went out to the shops today. For some reason it made me really grumpy, probably because I was hungry and craving a hot dog only to find out they were sold out
and in other news, a grape from the grapevine told me that JanitorAI (that one site with the NSFW AI bots) is gonna be blocking UK IP adresses because they can't keep up with the new online safety act, and honestly? good.
like. having a website thats full of NSFW and weird parasocial delusional shit be so easily accessible is a HORRIBLE IDEA. And when combined with how many people support this stuff on social media it just turns into one big grooming site- and I'm tired of pretending it isnt
In their statement they said something like "the UK is creating a big iron curtain blockign them from innovation" like YEAH BUDDY. YOUR SCAT NSFW STEPBROTHER BOT IS REAAALLLY INNOVATIVE AND IMPORTANT TO THE FUTURE.
anyways. I think I might be going to forbidden planet again tomorrow? uhh idk for sure though but if I am I'm DEFINITELY getting that evangelion ichibankuji again. Heard everythings half off there too. [tag] not midnight [tag] life [tag] AI # CAN THE DOCTORS STOP CALLING ME TENSE 2025-07-25T13:03:11.147Z I ran into a dilemma today. Found out that generally fan art shouldn't be included in your UNI portfolios. That made me go into quite a sour mood since quite a bit of my inspiration comes from other medias- so therefore my best work is usually fan
but at the same time it makes sense: when applying to art courses such as illustration you NEED to show you are able to make new, interesting, and standout art. So unfortunately, unless that fan art is REAALLY good or twists the narrative, your portfolio won't really be hitting those marks.
But anyways, I can just make plenty of my OC art to combat this. That's what I've been doing for 16 years (albeit at a faster pace, but the pace is going to slow with age+ growth of quality regardless).
hmmmm anyways. other stuff. I found the new Mau Makan Apa episode and its SO GOOD!! I'm genuinely blown away at how someone who's only a year or so older than me can make such a good series. I've also been making more progress on art fight, but generally I've been slowing down my attacks quite a bit at the same time since I don't wanna be burnt out when I've also got so much school work to do.
And finally, I chose my haloween costume with the help of my friends. I'm gonna be going as Yoshida from CSM since 1: we have roughly the same hair style, and 2: I'm gonna go see the movie on the 29th yay!
oh right. site updates are gonna pick up too since I'm going back to hand coding. Let me know if the layout is weird on your computers please!! [tag] not midnight [tag] life [tag] site # 400 megawatts to the power of god 2025-07-30T22:28:11.147Z once again no updates for a while. Mostly because I've been helping around the house and really putting my ass into gear when it comes to art. Like. Today I did FOUR ARTFIGHT ATTACKS????? ALL IN A FEW HOURS???
but since the event is gonna end in like a day I'll probably be a bit more lenient with myself, which then means more site updates. I've made a good bit of progress on the new layout though (even tho it looks a bit basic, what really counts is it being hand-coded).
Anyways. what have I been up to? well, now much obviously. Yesterday I went out shopping and came back with TONS of cool stuff. A few trinkets, a cool chainsawman cup that I only bought because Aki was on it, and somehow a fake chainsawman book??? idk. I also booked in my next hair appointment- I'm gonna get my hair dyed teal (for miku), but if the colour can't come out as BRIGHT teal cuz of my dark hair then I'm gonna go with red (for madcom ig???)
yurr. I'm writing thsi while eating the biggest bowl of noodles you could ever imagine. My life is just one big soggy noodle bowl full of the weirdest ingredients [tag] midnight [tag] life [tag] site # the end of artfight 2025-07-31T21:55:11.147Z and like that, art fight is basically over. I didn't draw all the ocs I wanted to since I knew I'd get burn the HELL out if I finished all 34 of those priority ocs. but for my first ever year of art fight? 21 attacks isn't that bad. I'll aim for like 30 or so next year.
in other news, I started on my personal statement for university. I didn;t actually realise hwo personal you needed to be (wow shocker) so I'm definitely struggling a bit. But I'm sure it'll be fine, it's just a rough draft anyways.
do you think if I mention newgrounds I'tll like... auto decline my application? surely not cuz how are they gonna dictate what inspires me, but at the same time. yknow. they really do mean it when they say "everything by EVERYONE". or was it "anything by anyone"? comment down below
its also someones birthday (NOT MINE) lelelele yayayayaya haoppy borthday :) [tag] midnight [tag] life [tag] school # yeah im normal. so normal. 2025-08-01T21:01:11.147Z I bought abought 6 feet worth of foam so I could make a fursuit head...for my illustration portfolio yeah man. just don't tell my IRLs.
AND IN OTHER NEWS IM TWEAKING! Does anyone else remember that one funny looking neocities webplayer? it was like... proper retro. I dont know how to describe it I just WANT A MUSIC PLAYER OK?! I CANT GO ON WITHOUT ONE!
and this problem will be solved in about one day.
in more other news--- one, I have fleas. two? UhhHH I'm starting to not like my layout again and I HAVENT EVEN FINISHED IT! can I atleast finish the thing before being sick of it and making a new one? our sources say no.
i really wanta grilled cheese rn
and some soup [tag] midnight [tag] site # work it! yeah yeah! 2025-08-02T23:55:11.147Z yeah so no one told me that SCM player (the music player I was looking for last night) had been discontinued or smthn so...
but I found another one that was basically the same, so we have music now on the new homepage. Hope you like my tunes
hmmm yes yes. In other news I made my first upload on newgrounds! one of many.
I guess thats about it for today? I spent a good chunk of the day napping since if it gets over 20 degrees in my room I just instantly pass out and nape for like 10 hours. so muhc for me being productive this month. [tag] midnight [tag] site # cant you see I need to blink 2025-08-03T15:55:11.147Z Updating CSS is such a pain for me. Like, sometimes it'll be REALLY responsive and work fast but most of the time it takes about 8 business days to show the updated code.
thats probably just a me problem though so yknow. thats how the crumble cookies???
did I also mention that I have about 79 WHOLE INCHES of foam coming in a few days? it was an impulsive purchase but can you really pass on that much foam for the low price of £14? I don't think so. [tag] not midnight [tag] site [tag] life # a suit...made of fur. 2025-08-05T22:55:11.147Z to no one's surprise: I'm a furry.
so, today the foam arrived! It wasn't really as wide as I was hoping, but still a bargain for £14 (I think). Instead of waiting until tomorrow to actually get started on my idea (since I don't have any math skills) I rushed ahead and.. yeah the thing doesn't even fit my head. How did I manage that? IDK MAN.
But anyways, I'll just re use all the foam I wasted and use it as padding or somethign on the actual thing.
but this has also given em a new idea- what if I make a madness combat fursuit? yeah the visibility and ventilation will be PISS POOR but creativity!!! I don't think anyones made one before.
google search break
yeah it onyl comes up with furry fan art and stuff, so I'm really enclined to do it.
these cramps are also actually killing me if the site doesnt update for likr a week just know THE CRAMPS GOT ME. [tag] midnight [tag] life [tag] fursuit # Where have you been? 2025-08-14T22:55:11.147Z I've been pushing myself more lately just to get stuff done. I dont want to end up being swamped with schoolwork when I get back in college (As well as working on my portfolio and uni application)- So I'm kinda forcing myself to get as much done as I can each day
but I did finish the base for that fursuit a bit ago! it doesnt really resemble a racoon, but for a first try it isnt all that bad. My only concern is how I'm gonna fur it and if the pen I used on the foam is gonna stain
uhh what else. Im trying to hold my money a bit looser? I guess?? usually I don't like spending my money at ALL it makes me feel anxious and scared for some reason. But then I realised that I literally get paid to come to college (and exist), so no matter what I buy the money will always come back
AND RESULTS DAY!! RESULTS DAY IS NOW.
In the end I got 2 As, a Distinction star, and a pass. Even though I know I should feel happy, for some reason I just feel confused? and stressed? Maybe its because my teachers already said Id be getting those grades so then Ive therefore already coem to terms with the achievement.
I dont know man. Im thinking of making a nice bowl of noodles to celebrate. [tag] not midnight [tag] life [tag] school [tag] fursuit